exercitiu de compozitie nr. I

iti scriu aceste randuri doar ca sa'ntelegi, sperand ca pan' la urma vei avea destul curaj s'alegi, destul ne'am prefacut si ne'am jucat c'am fi mai sinceri, restul n'a mai contat, acum primesti cand ceri, nu te uita prin mine, nu incerca sa treci prin mine, nu'ti pierde cumpatul de data asta, nu'ncerca sa'mi ascunzi masca, satul de stat s'astept, aleg aleator, caci am mintit mai jos, din jocul asta nu iesi castigator, totul atarna'n firele ce se itesc din noi, sunt invizibile si chiar, dispar aproape, atunci cand le vezi cel mai clar. spui ca sunt las, dar ma ascund din nestiinta, din neputinta de a face fata la tot ce'i mai rau, nu vreau sa lupt c'o lume ce triseaza, nu vreau sa'mi dau cartile pe fata'n timp ce toti pluseaza, e miza mare'n joc, e miza ce ne inconjoara'n tot, mizeria de pe asfalt e o reflexie banala a sufletului nostru care'i doar o incapere goala. si ti'am zis "haide sa umplem golurile" si mi'ai ras in fata'n mod involuntar, credei ca'i chiar asa usor sa'ti dezlipesti guma de sters de pe trotuar? tu vrei sa ploua peste tine, vrei fulgere si pomi luati de vant, dar eu sunt cel ce vand sperante si nu poti sa ma accepti, deci dintre noi care'i mai slab pana la urma... ce dracu tot astepti? si crede'ma cand zic ca n'o sa poti uita... pana la urma noi suntem doar fulgi de nea in primavara verii noastre, nu, n'o sa poti uita... suntem imaginile visurilor noastre...

nu conteaza, eu casc ceruri... tu'mi nasti geruri... ce naiba, tu nu vezi cum tremuri?

flow

asta'i jocu'n care te prind, nu te alint si nu vreau sa te mai plac, te'arunc la gunoi cu un fals trac
dar stii ca eu doar ma prefac, eu doar zic, nu fac, eu vorbesc doar sa nu tac, si'o sa daram orice'as construi pan' la urma, timp doar sa am sa'mi ajunga. iau totul in gluma, sunt un tip cinic si rau, fac totul doar pentru'a rani, nu m'ai vrea cu tine, zau, dar eu nu stau pe loc, de cele mai multe ori ma vezi plecand undeva, niciodata venind, niciodata cu zambetul pe buze, niciodata sarind, niciodata sperand, c'am pierdut'o si p'aia de mult, niciodata razand, l'am uitat cu ochii plini de lacrimi, plangand. nu spun ca's baiatul pe care de mica se zice ca'i bine sa'l ocolesti, dar nu spun nici ca nu ar fi bine sa ma eviti pan' mai cresti, poate si dup'aia, nu te'avertizez de nimic doar de faptul ca se'ntoarce foaia. incet si pan' la urma o sa fie o unica linie, cuvintele reliefuri pe ea, si'un munte ce'o strange in pumnul ce'i mana mea. asta'i jocul in care oricine se pierde, deci ce sanse ai? sanse n'ai asta e jocul meu si eu decid care'i primul care va iesi invins, primul care va fi prins, primul licar care va fi stins. pot sa'ncalc regulile daca vreau si am s'o fac dinadins. uita'te la mine, uite cum dispar sub aceleasi masti pe care le am, uite cum ma transform iar in omul ce eram, uite cum, indiferent de voi, indiferent de ce probleme'aveti, voi trece cu vederea si va voi lasa sa va zbateti chiar daca pot face ceva, nimic nu mai conteaza, nimic nu mai e cum era, pastreaza'ti constiinta... prefa'te'n continuare ca vezi clar ce va urma. de data asta nu's mai ultimul, esti ultima.

[daca zambesc ziceti ca's ingamfat si'anost. credeti ce vreti, aveti grija sa nu va fie dor de omul ce am fost]

[

Uita ce am scris

Pe mine noaptea, ma viziteaza stafii, si da, sunt ale mele,
Spirite ce vin si pleaca dintre palme, fara sa lase semne,
Fara sa-mi zica "Te iubesc!", sau cine-stie-ce refrene...
Trece timpul si rasaritul ma prinde mereu la o cafea cu ele...

Si mai vorbim de una alta,
Si ne mai amintim de noi,
Si mai vobim de noi si gata, din priviri
Ne stabilim iar intalniri...

Domnisoara, matura mai repede tot ce am dezvelit,
Caci dimineatza nu o port asa, ci langa tine, obosit.

Mai bate mama la usa camerei si ma intreaba "Iar nu dormi?"; rasufla trista ca baiatul ei se-mparte iar la doi... Stie ea cumva ce ma tot tine treaz, si nu insista... Iar ma lasa sa ma pierd in ceas...

Si stii ce-i zic?

- Eu, draga mama, nu mai dorm, eu scriu pana cand mainile imi cad in gol, pana cand ele-or sa ma lase sa ma duc spre alte vise...

Iar vine noaptea, iar voi fi trist cu portile inchise...

Mai caut in sufragerie si acum o mica umbra
Este ea, cea care a uitat sa ma mai planga...
Sunt surprins de-atunci incoace de lipsitul tau suspin
Unde esti? Sub cartea asta, sau sub vre-un pahar de vin?

Si ma doare, si ascult vantul obosit sub geamuri,
Si cum, lenesa, si noaptea se ascunde printre ramuri,
Intunericul e azi mult mai jovial, cu ochi timizi de ciocolata,
Nu ma mai sperie, sta cuminte si asculta, mai atent ca niciodata...

Cu o palma in falca,
Si creioanele imi casca,
Nu au chef de poezii,
Nu mai stiu ce vrei sa stii

Si vreau sa ma ajuti, sa-mi spui...

"Ai muzica asta... Iubeste ce scrii, dragul meu, pentru ca lumea uita..."

Si eu scriu si lumea uita ce am scris,
Si eu scriu si lumea uita ce am scris,
Si eu scriu si lumea uita ce am scris,
Si eu scriu si lumea uita ce am scris!

Si eu scriu si lumea uita... Si tu uiti...

Imagineaza-ti cum stau eu in fiecare noapte, mai bagand ceva acolo, incercand sa ma impac cu cacatul asta...

is this real?

so... is this real?

we keep on turning around and keep on spinning around
we get grips on slippery places, we're almost lost and found
and every time i think about it i say to myself oh my god!

put everything to one side and open our eyes
we give more to receive less end then it's good'bye
but we never give up 'cuz we don't believe the lies

it's rays that give strength, and rays that lose faith
i don't care about being blocked out forever, i'll never be left
because i know when i'm right and i never lose sight

stretch your legs out forever, we're in this together
we're only addicted to the harshest of beats
and it's these things that bond us and fuel never'seen before feats!
the living in tension is the only direction we know
and no one may keep us apart, 'cuz we show
how to visualize your objectives and Oh!
give in to your dreams and you'll never be low

sick psycho schematics, motion without being static at all
we're never caught in this traffic and we know no wall
that red means stop, but that green means go
and life's a row of forever green lights for us
so...

hold your head and say oh my god!
hold my hand and say...
hold your breath and say...
it's like...

oh my god...

just recognize who we are, we just want to live if we're lucky
it's not over'exceeded, this is just me being cocky
so i'll stretch my mind 'till i'm the one and only...
always for real, baby, we are never phony...

[ yeah, it is ]

vad totul prin tine

intors de departe's putin plin si'obosit
cu ochii rosii vad lumea'n culori de'asfintit
si vinisoare de sange'mi umplu mintea de stele
nu stiu de ce am plecat, vrajit de placere.
acum caut tacere, e zgomot in jur
un vuiet constant, vreau liniste'n jur.
simt o mana c'o curpinde pe'e mea
dar sunt singur pe hol, aici nu e ea.
ganduri ciudate se nasc, ochii'mi se dau peste cap
cred c'am clacat la un punct, intre'un fum si un sfat
m'am vazut intins pe un pat, cearsaful si eu transpirat
mi'am zis "ce dracu fac eu aici?"... si'am plecat...
acum mi se pare ciudat, nu pot sa dorm cum dormeam
imi urla capu'n durere si tot uit ce faceam
am inceput sa fac asta ca sa pot sa mai rad cateodata
am inceput sa fac asta ca sa pot sa mai rad cateodata

nu'mi amintesc nimic din tot ce gandeam, nu mai stiu deloc
ma uit in oglinda si vad totul prin mine
de ce'mi tot incalc regulile, sa nu'mi mai incalc regulile deloc?
ma uit in oglinda si vad totul prin mine

in momentul asta logica ar spune sa dorm, sa nu mai ascult de ce zic
sunt pe punctul de'a face ceva aleator si isteric
ma simt putin agitat, simt ca'mi furnica pielea pe mine
dar simt cum ma desprind si nimic nu ma tine
nu vreau sa cred ca totu'i rezultatul actiunilor determinate de tine
dar nu vreau sa ma vada nimeni asa, cred c'asta ma retine
ma uit in oglinda si vad totul prin mine...

e de'abia rasarit, dar lumina e rece si cruda
timpul e plin de caldura aceea putreda si plina de ura
e prea multa lumina aici, privelistea te fura
am flori uscate intr'o vaza pe masa si'un gust de moarte in gura...
ma uit la tapet si's furat de modele
in fiecare zi's furate, copiate modele
in plin sprint ma'mpiedic de ele
cred ca asta'i problema cu ele
nu's modele de stele....
dar trecand peste toate, sa nu uit sa nu uit niciodata
am inceput sa fac asta ca sa pot sa mai rad cateodata...

[cred ca se simte putin speriata
ca tine, de altfel, cel putin cateodata
n'o lasa s'adoarma, spune'i c'o iubesti ca odata
n'o lasa s'adoarma, spune'i c'o iubesti ca odata]

zic...

poate ca nu avem nimic in comun
dar asta n'o sa ne opreasca, nu?
chiar daca nu ma crezi, iti place sa iti spun
ca'n viata mea esti numai tu
privesti cu ochi albastri lumea si'o reduci
la florile si Kent'ul de pe masa
dar nu alergi dupa tot felul de haiduci
asta inseamna ca iti pasa?
esti intr'o stare de elan in prima faza
si'ai aripi ce'i dau vantului putere
si sens, un scop, ca'n orice raza
... ii pui vers in orice fraza
si'i tii mintea treaza.
nu auzi nimic din jur c'ai castile'n urechi
dar n'o s'auzi nimic de rau asa
modele noi pentru orice praf vechi
lumea se'nvarte fiindca dansezi tu cu ea
exista litere de lege si legile nescrise
vrei doar sa'ti fie date toate cele promise
mereu ocolesti caci si'asa avem timp
cand vrei sa fii lasata'n pace, nu ceri nimic in schimb...
spun ca de'atatea ori nu s'a'ntamplat nimic
da' totusi viata'i ca un caine pe un stick
lasat in ploaie'n iarna noaptea, hai sa evadam
da fapt hai sa mai stam, mai bine nu scapam...

[Rodeo Jockey vs. Monkey United : 5-5]

chiar crezi ca ma cunosti?

i like...

the way the sun shines on dead roads lost to the world
and how the syllables perfectly fall in every word
blue eyes and dark hair, with skin as white as snow
to get high and fly only to fall down to the lowest of lows

i like...

conspiracy theories, reasons and plots
dead flowers in dead flowerpots and knots
fires and smoking and matches and light
curses and words that cause pain and delight

i like...

playing a part in life's greatest play
seeing it all fall apart in rot and decay
illusions and dreams, things that *pop* in the night
making my point and always being right

i like

lying insanely and sometimes lying in bed
laying a carpet of roses for those who deserve
vaguely remembering the the day that she left
and most of all lying to myself...

[fug de realitate, nu vreau sa imi primesc destinul, stiu ca'l am, doar il aman, nu vreau sa'mi fie'usor, nu vreau sa ma plictisesc, nu vreau sa va indeplinesc asteptarile, dar va voi uimi pe toti. pentru ca toti stiti ca pot dar nu stiti cat de mult inca... cand va fi cazul, voi lasa guri cascate in urma mea. puteti sa fiti siguri de asta... deocamdata o ard fara pretentii... oricum n'am nevoie de voi, nici voi de mine si poate va fut in gura pe toti, toti, toti, tot trec peste toate]

inutilitate seaca

nimeni nu mai lupta pentru nimic in zilele astea. societatea e o masa diforma de oameni care alearga haotic, fara tinta, incercand sa dea sens existentei lor, si asa, precare. prietenii sunt doar oameni la fel de plictisiti si inutili care, intamplator, au ales sa coexiste si sa "nu faca" nimic impreuna. sentimentul asta de apartenenta e, oricum, doar o iluzie. pentru ca totul e o iluzie. azi e soare afara, dar e trecator. la noapte nu va mai fi soare. logic, nu. pana maine totul se poate da peste cap. poate se innoreaza. poate incepe si sa ploua. poate va fi furtuna. sau cutremur. poate maine va fi ultima zi din scurta existenta a omenirii si noi stam ca prostii si scriem/citim bloguri in loc sa mergem sa profitam de, poate, ultima zi insorita a vietii noastre. si uite asa, uitam de unde am pornit. nu vroiam sa subliniez cat de precara e viata insasi. dar, ca intotdeauna, sensul unui cuvant se pierde intr'o mare de "continut" inutil. nimeni nu mai lupta pentru nimic. asta e ideea. poate sunt eu prea batran pentru varsta mea, sau, din contra, prea tanar pentru cati ani am, dar uneori mi se pare ca inot intr'o mare de prosti. niciodata nu m'am autoinclus intre ei. pentru ca nu cred ca sunt prost. incerc sa caut alti oameni care nu sunt prosti. sunt multi oameni speciali, fiecare in felul lor. toti au idei bune cateodata si toti sunt "spirite libere". dar incearca sa'i mobilizezi sa faca ceva notabil. si atunci te vei lovi de ziduri de indiferenta si pasivitate. de aia sunt multi prosti. pentru ca atunci cand lumea nu se asteapta la nimic de la tine, nu ai nici un motiv sa lupti pentru ceva. nu mai exista asteptari si standarde si asta e trist. toti se pierd in context si inteleg ce vor ei cand incerci sa le spui ceva. asa se face ca am inceput sa "selectez clientela"... ma apuc sa ma descotorosesc incet de oamenii care'mi sunt inutili. si asa m'au tras destul in urma. stiu ca pot mai mult si voi face mai mult. si nu o sa ma mai las tras in jos de balast in plus. sunt satul de oameni care nu asculta, care cred ca doar parerea lor conteaza, care nu accepta c'au gresit si care nu invata din greseli. lor le spun la revedere si voi incerca sa'i pastrez cat mai aproape pe ceilalti.

[deocamdata imi ajunge locul pe care'l ocup, nu vreau si locul tau. dar daca imi apare in drum spre locul cuiva pe care'l vreau, fii sigur ca te voi da jos de pe el.]

.the.end.

come on... there's more to everything than meets the eye

you can't just close your eyes to something, hoping it would die

there are no ways to choose the right path for the right to choose

and there are so many things around, you don't care if you lose

there's always something else and always someone better

and i'm starting to get sick and tired of writing all these letters

there is no point, no reason and no gain

it's all my passion that gets spent on you, in vain

i'm not depressed, i'm mad, i'm angry and fed up

and i'm starting to let go of this great load i keep locked up

it's just holding me back, i have to much potential

i've had it, it's enough, we're only broken shells

and what we were is dead and gone and lost...

si nu mai vad in tine nici un rost...

[sfarsit]

.o.t.y. no .o.t.m.!

it's so easy to say and give all away
it's so easy not to care, not to stay
there's no real reason to cry the world away
when all you gotta do is restrain...
you chase dreams, you want a highlife
but in the chase come errors and you're stuck with a high life
a narcotic nausea that follows you wherever
and causes you to bleed your eyes out forever
i don't have the right to pass on the rite
but i know i've been chosen
to choose my own way to write
but i'm broken...
my wrists feel like strangling my life out of me
and my heart keeps on pumping
for the kid that never really got to live
he's still kicking and screaming
it's for the one deep inside that i struggle
it's for the fight that i can never really win in the end
it's all these feelings i juggle
that never seem to blend...
you know how it is, you've hit walls before
a never ending chase, but you know that your hardcore
you know you can bottle it inside and you know you'll survive...
it's not about the props anymore, it's just about life
it's not the game anymore, it's just the pain and the gain
it's not the coming on top anymore, it's the strife
and it's all about knowing nothing was in vain...
never hesitated before, so i wont stop to rest
even though it all collapses daily and it's all just a jest
but i know what i want and i won't stop for suckers
so have a nice trip, see you motherfuckers!

get your fucking high life, i'll stay suburban forever
'cause there's no place to call home in the middle of nowhere
never move on, i care too much about people to lie
but i'd rather keep you in suffering than just let you die...

[you're looking in all the wrong places]

in al doilea rand... .m.g.w.

這不被認為讀這是我的尖叫為救世這是為所有詞在我的頭裡想要來外部和戲劇。我無所事事地坐當世界通過我不介意, 並且我不改變什麼因為它容易哭泣, 單獨以被打碎的心臟。我能做任何東西。我有非常潛力, 並且我嚴密地講話大約那個我意識到我能改變命運世界但我因為我是空的。我不想要得到在這是唯一的事給我力量我永遠將寫對此並且我將贏取這場戰爭在最後我將 是的我的哀情我想要是的地方並且我將是誰我要是我是一切具體化為它是錯誤與世界和驕傲的! 但您不能聽見我, 是? 我是一個該死的現代天英雄並且我將得到英雄的葬禮再見。


[smoke.and mirrors.]

in primul rand... o copie

Nu e deloc usor sa scap,
Imi este foarte greu sa tac,
Poate ca mai bine ar fi sa fac
Absolut tot ce'mi trece prin cap.
Mi'am dorit foarte mult sa te fac sa simti
Insa banuiam tot timpul ca minti
Acum tu esti cea care a cazut
Ai cazut, cat de jos s'a putut!

N'ai fost langa mine atunci cand am avut
Atata nevoie de tine, atata nevoie de tine...

As vrea sa stii cat de mult imi doresc
Absolut nimic sa nu'mi amintesc
Esti pentru mine doar un vis urat,
Esti un trecut, un trecut, doar atat.
N'o sa mai insemni niciodata nimic
Poza ta a murit intr'un plic,
Pentru tine simt acum numai ura
Nu vorbi, nu vorbi taci din gura!!!

N'ai fost langa mine atunci cand am avut
Atata nevoie de tine, atata nevoie de tine...

Tot ce'a fost intre noi acum este mort
Dragostea noastra un simplu avort
Cei ca tine sunt niste orori,
Priveste'ma'n ochi, acum o sa mori!
Ai vrut prea mult sa ma vezi la pamant,
S'a terminat, acum te'am infrant
Te urasc enorm pentru tot ce'ai facut
N'o sa stii niciodata cat de rau a durut!

N'ai fost langa mine atunci cand am avut
Atata nevoie de tine, atata nevoie. de tine...

[我太多說謊了對我自己]

.l.p.b.

Dead so I've played to merely turn him on
Don't let creed take too much of us
He'll rivet hard to suffer rotten wrong
The prince's mood darkens me strong

C'est lui,
Mon prince bleu, mon soleil
Chantant dans mon sommeil
Des mots, des monts et merveilles
Attendant que je m'éveille

C'est toi
Mon prince bleu, mon soleil
Je vais chanter pareil
Des mots, des monts et merveilles
Que jamais je ne m'éveille

Le Prince Bleu
Je brulerai ton absence
J'érigerai
Un trone blanc

Il reviendra
Sur son fier alezan
Le Prince Bleu
Comme je l'attends

C'est lui,
Mon prince bleu, mon soleil
Chantant dans mon sommeil
Des mots, des monts et merveilles
Attendant que je m'éveille

C'est toi
Mon prince bleu, mon soleil
Je vais chanter pareil
Des mots, des monts et merveilles
Que jamais je ne m'éveille

Je donnerais
Tous les croissants de lune
Tous les bijoux
De la fortune

Sent you to tears when pride first seized my womb
Post-mortem's tune, my prince he croons
Sickly my prince's mood, so sullen shutdown the door today
The more no more is relayed after dark confirms his bane
Sits tall my prince is bruised, he's so lame his fairness ricochets
'till all his sores are self slain and demand a brother's reign

Sits tall my prince is bruised, he's so lame his fairness ricochets
'till all his sores are self slain and demand a brother's reign


[que donneriez-vous pour juste une apparence de l'amour ?]

.a.d.b.c.

passing back through obscure rooms
and i go further through darkness that looms
along the hallways i step past, beyond
no, i shouldn't look back 'cause it's wrong!
anyway i won't remember much if i do
i don't remember any of you!
but for those few scraps that remain
i won't puzzle them together, i will refrain...
it's easy as long as i keep fighting the fight
just sleep or keep busy during the night
keep chasing my dreams in the daylight
and then get new dreams to chase
once i achieve them!

again, as solemn as the colossus of Rhodos
i will not shed my water for those that are lost
i'll keep out of time like the Great Pyramid of Khufu
and i'll visit Giza to die there, i won't do it for you!
stopped deceiving us, the many that struggle inside
we built the Great Wall once more just to keep you outside
we ate our souls from within, kept raising our chin
kept raising our voices like heroes, we sing
revived yet immortal from the depths of catacombs
and stood prouder than the Hanging Gardens of Babylon!
we carried our spirits through the roughest of seas
by the light of Alexandria's Great Lighthouse that sees
and we avoided the Styx, sunk Charon and the Cerberus
to reach the promised land which was taken from us!
we hate those who desecrate, no excuse for such things
they scrawled the walls of the Valley of Kings!
they plundered the Ephesus Temple of The Queen of the Beasts
they pillaged the Mausoleum and tore down the Statue of Zeus!
from robbers to holy crusaders, we'll watch how they burn
in the Land of the Dead, where the fates always turn!

[we'll put rock to rock'shaped eggs in the same fashion
we'll go eye for an eye, in an endless procession]

.t.i.f.a.

Vous appréciiez un verre de l'eau. Peuplez la poussée près, en marchant alors au loin dans la nuit. C'est la manière que la roue de la vie tourne vous laisser aveugle par les lumières. Dans un brouillard et stupéfié, principal complètement des brumes et des fantômes des ombres passées. Vous tournez loin, aucun doute. N'importe quelle personne raisonnable courrait leurs coeurs dehors. Mais quelque chose vous garde là. Elle ne pourrait pas être quelque chose physique parce que vous êtes seul en mer de l'espace vide. Mais vous ne pouvez pas vous déplacer. Il n'y a aucune réception au téléphone. Tous vos cris perdent dans la distance. Aucun écho ne peut être entendu. Ainsi c'est comment il doit être totalement seul ? Vous avez peur pour prendre une mesure. Peut-être vous êtes sur une place suspendue dedans entre le ciel et la terre au-dessus d'un abîme éternel. Ilvaut- il mieux de se tenir ou tomber pour le reste de votre vie ? Ou pour toujours. Ce qui si, dans cet endroit vous êtes immortel ? Ce qui si c'est enfer ? Mais encore plus mauvais, ce qui si c'est ciel ? Ou peut-être quelque part dans l'intervalle ? Que diriez-vous de d'un autre verre de l'eau ? Qui s'inquiète... Il y a un air entrant. Il vous hypnotise. Vous pourriez jurer que vous n'avez vu aucun orateur sur votre chemin dedans. Les silhouettes commencent à former vers le haut avant vos yeux. Elles se déplacent violemment et vous vous demandez s'il est en raison de douleur ou de plaisir. Vous avez un autre verre de l'eau. Mais vous avez encore soif ! La musique obtient plus fort. Elle frappe ! Soudainement, votre corps commence à contracter au battement. Vous n'êtes plus dans la commande. Rien n'importe désormais. Vous ne vous rappellerez pas une chose le matin. Vous pensez, dans le dernier moment de la lucidité, que peut-être vous ne devriez pas avoir fait cela le bout un. Vous réalisez que vous êtes écrasé. Alors vous passez hors de...

[it's in the water, baby...]

.d.y.e.

In one single moment your whole life can turn 'round
I stand there for a minute starin' straight into the ground
Lookin' to the left slightly, then lookin' back down
World feels like it's caved in - proper sorry frown
Please let me show you where we could only just be, for us
I can change and I can grow or we could adjust
The wicked thing about us is we always have trust
We can even have an open relationship, if you must
I look at her she stares almost straight back at me
But her eyes glaze over like she's lookin' straight through me
Then her eyes must have closed for what seems an eternity
When they open up she's lookin' down at her feet

Dry your eyes mate
I know it's hard to take but her mind has been made up
There's plenty more fish in the sea
Dry your eyes mate
I know you want to make her see how much this pain hurts
But you've got to walk away now
It's over

So then I move my hand up from down by my side
It's shakin', my life is crashin' before my eyes
Turn the palm of my hand up to face the skies
Touch the bottom of her chin and let out a sigh
'Cause I can't imagine my life without you and me
There's things I can't imagine doin', things I can't imagine seein'
It weren't supposed to be easy, surely
Please, please, I beg you please
She brings her hands up towards where my hands rested
She wraps her fingers round mine with the softness she's blessed with
She peels away my fingers, looks at me and then gestures
By pushin' my hand away to my chest, from hers

Dry your eyes mate
I know it's hard to take but her mind has been made up
There's plenty more fish in the sea
Dry your eyes mate
I know you want to make her see how much this pain hurts
But you've got to walk away now
It's over

And I'm just standin' there, I can't say a word
'Cause everythin's just gone
I've got nothin'
Absolutely nothin'

Tryin' to pull her close out of bare desperation
Put my arms around her tryin' to change what she's sayin'
Pull my head level with hers so she might engage in
Look into her eyes to make her listen again
I'm not gonna fuckin', just fuckin' leave it all now
'Cause you said it'd be forever and that was your vow
And you're gonna let our things simply crash and fall down
You're well out of order now, this is well out of town
She pulls away, my arms are tightly clamped round her waist
Gently pushes me back and she looks at me straight
Turns around so she's now got her back to my face
Takes one step forward, looks back, and then walks away

Dry your eyes mate
I know it's hard to take but her mind has been made up
There's plenty more fish in the sea
Dry your eyes mate
I know you want to make her see how much this pain hurts
But you've got to walk away now
It's over

I know in the past I've found it hard to say
Tellin' you things, but not tellin' straight
But the more I pull on your hand and say
The more you pull away

Dry your eyes mate
I know it's hard to take but her mind has been made up
There's plenty more fish in the sea
Dry your eyes mate
I know you want to make her see how much this pain hurts
But you've got to walk away now.

.g.l.e.t.

-ceau

-salut, ce faci?
-da nimic, ma plictiseam in casa si m'am hotarat sa ma scot la o cafea! (zambeste)
-vrei companie?
-oferi?
-doar daca oferi tu cafeaua! (zambeste si ea)
-hai stai jos... cum esti?
-la fel, poate putin mai satula de cotidian.
-de ce?
-pai aceleasi chestii, la lucru e naspa, vreau sa demisionez ca nu mai am timp de mine, de prieteni, de nimic... am impresia ca ma indrept spre ceva ce nu'mi place.
-pai si atunci de ce nu iei masuri?
-pentru ca ma tine ceva in loc... nu stiu ce.
-nu ai nici cea mai vaga idee?
-as avea, dar nu vreau sa ii dau glas... poate pune stapanire pe mine si voi fi si mai incurcata apoi.
-pai altfel ramai prinsa in... cum i'ai zis tu... "cotidian".
-da, stiu. nu e neaparat rau... dar nu sunt multumita. am atatea planuri si vise, dar nu stiu de ce nu ma apuc de ele. k doar nu e greu. trebuie doar sa ma aplic.
-pai fa'o! (rade)
-mda.
-nah nu face bot... nu te critic.
-stiu, doar ca nu imi place sa mi se spuna ce sa fac.
-pai atunci ne'am hotarat... nu'ti mai zic nimic.
-mersi. (zambeste... parca)
-ai ceva pe cap, asa'i?
-in afara de par?
-da, evident.
-da, dar sunt problemele mele, nu are rost sa ti le pun tie in carca.
-te ajut daca vrei.
-ma descurc, mersi. (ii suna telefonul, se ridica de la masa, iese pana afara sa vorbeasca)
.............
-trebuie sa plec.
-deja? nici nu ti'ai terminat cafeaua.
-da... vorbim. pa!
-mda. ceau! (se uita la ea cum pleaca, cum a facut'o de atatea ori)

asta e un prototip. sa'i zicem scenariu. uneori conversatia difera, actorii raman la fel, aceiasi si, invariabil, circumstante atenuante nu exista niciodata. la sfarsitul zilei nimeni nu se simte mai bine. in cel mai bun caz... la fel.

partea frumoasa e ca puteam sa fac scenariul asta cum vroiam eu, sa'mi las mintea sa zboare spre culmi nemaiintalnite si sa transform totul intr'o discutie plina de haz, sarcasm si replici taioase. dar atunci ar fi fost cea mai mare minciuna spusa vreodata.

ramanem la fel "de" ca de obicei

.h.a.l.t.

as vrea sa fie noapte uneori
la nesfarsit sa nu mai fie zori
sa nu mai prind lumini din iad
si zambete ce le'ntalnesc si cad

cuvinte ce le scriu si ard
si sunete ce se transforma'n murmur fad
reactii la nimic exagerate
transformate'n cauze desarte

oricum's deja departe
cand tot ce ne apropia doar ne desparte
sper sa ma citesti din nou candva
dar nu din nou cu mintea

nu inteleg de n'auzi ce'ti zic mereu
nu stiu de ce tot cred ca sunt de vina eu
nu pot schimba nimic din tot ce'a fost
si ma condamni!

[sunt prost...]

And I'd wish the sun would never come
It's 4 AM and you are done
I hope you know you're letting go
It's 4 AM and I'm alone

.y.s.o.m.b.

aduna kilometri... aduna kilometri sub centura
ca sa ma regasesti... uita'l pe el
uita de tzel... uite de psalmii care'ti suna'n cap
ce cantec iti rasuna'n cap?

nu ma prefac ca pot schimba ceva
nu vreau sa cred ca pot schimba lumea
se schimba oricum ea
si eu raman la fel
ma inconjoara ea, si eu raman la fel...
la fel de rece si de neschimbat
nepasator la timp, si la fel de ciudat...
rasare soarele si'apune la sfarsitul zilei
oricum ma prinde dormind
ma vede dorind sa pot zbura
sau sa pot derula totul inainte 'napoi
dupa cum dracu' "voi"
si apoi pleaca... si nu'mi pasa
daca'i noapte sau e zi, zi'i tu ca nu'mi mai pasa!
ca eu nu mai am chef de jocul asta
zi'i sa'si cada singur in plasa...

si da... observ ca'ncet nu ma mai doare'n pula
daca peretii astia ar vorbi... n'ar mai tacea din gura...

stau jos, stagnez, stau doar sa stau
nu's obosit ca acum m'am trezit
si nu mai stiu ce urmaresc/ce vreau?
si chiar asa... de fapt... doar stau...
sunt orb si prost, urat, jegos
dar nu e nimeni sa ma vada
ca stau cu lumina stinsa si tigara'aprinsa'n cada
si ce'i cel mai rau ca nu vad schimbare in curand
si nici nu stiu daca o vreau... sau oare?
sunt plin de vicii grosolane si tampite
sunt scarbos, cand mananc ragaii
si ma sterg la bot cu "Boii dupa Vite"
nu'ti convine? si iar crezi ca stii totul despre mine, da?
normal ca'mi citesti fiecare miscare... am scris cartea!

nu sunt destept sau stralucit
nu sunt boem ca n'am citit nimic in viata mea
nu vreau sa par spontan, prietenos
sunt ros de ura pana'n os...
nu'mi pasa, nu's atent, nu's grijuliu
nu sunt dragut si nici nu vreau sa fiu!
nu sunt amabil , nu's plin de curtoazie
si te'as face sa plangi cu orice ocazie...
nu's carismatic... merg singur in pula mea
oricum n'o sa te conving vreodata de ceva!

["I've got a golden axe and i chop cherry trees down
Dead to this world. bury me now."]

we just love the way it sounds

punk'rock's out, black'dyed hair and baggy clothes are out, grunge is out, all the things that i grew up with are out... and i can't help but feel a bit disappointed at that. now it's the age of pseudo' gagsters and "cool" kids. now it's "in" to club, to bang your heads to d'n'b, get high and get "expansive". it's expensive. and superficial. there's no more heart in anything. and it all seems based on $ these days. there's no more innocence and no more love. the age of the super city freaks and flah are in. old school hip hop is gone. and so are lyrics that touched the right buttons to make you vibe. these are the days of pre'pubescent teens that get drunk and get in trouble, of cheap booze and carelessness, of cheap women and dirty bathrooms. where the fuck is MY generation? what happened to all the plans and dreams and changes we wanted to make? is this it? i'd rather not, if that's the case. we failed, and failed miserably, at that. and nothing comes after us, because we took care of burning all the bridges and scorching every fertile field in our wake.

you know, everybody exagerates sometimes... but to make a casual thing seem "gangsta"... that's just stupid. i see kids lying on their backs on floors, their friends shaking in a corner or puking in a gutter. it's like nobody gives a fuck anymore. not about anybody else OR about themselves. people forgot the number for the 911 emergency... but they know by heart the one of their dealer, of their "homies" and their "ho's"... and that's just sad... i'd rather not live like that, but i just won't give up... it's the world that was shaped and burned before my eyes. and i can't change that. but i can keep myself real and true and through... i WILL see this to the end... because it's not my place to be ashamed... i've got too much reality to be addicted to... and i'll keep real to the game... my own and by my rules...

"i don't want the truth, i wanna feel fuckin' cool"

XOXO - flow

it all started out just like a dream, a brilliantly excavated part of real, inside surreal and dearly beloved... it evolved just like a palm through to a fist that's gloved, through to a hit that's blocked and re'thrown... and everything was just a series of pivotal moments in time... of movements and chimes... of verses and rhymes... but this is me at my most honest... no egos, no status, just me... still dreaming of us... but all that I can do is write and hope to God you're reading it... because these words are here for that, there's no more faking it... there's no more ways that were left untried, and no small doses... so now i'm e-mailing my love with a dozen digital roses...